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Sunday, 13 July 2008

  • Scribbles Vol.2

    v.
    the more i know you
    the deeper i fall
    i should stay away, distance myself
    but then, you turn to be always there
    you make me smile
    you make me laugh
    you make me feel good
    about myself, life and right now
    but i'm scared, really
    why does this happen now
    i've long waited for something like this
    and it's you who just can't stay for long
    now i don't want this
    but it's too late to runaway now
    if only i can switch off
    everytime you're around
    but i know i just can't
    eventhough i wish i really could
    to stop my heart from crying (or breaking)
    knowing i'll just be a good friend to you

    vi.
    sometimes i want to distance myself
    i'd convince myself to stay away
    however whenever i see you
    it's your smile that greets me
    i just want you near
    i want you to be sitting beside me.
    you're with your friends
    i can't stop but stare and smile.
    i know i'm really crazy
    i shouldn't be feeling this way
    let me pretend, nothing has happened
    i'd fake a smile as if everything's alright
    i'll try and control myself, stop myself
    before this feeling takes over me.

    01.10
    i want to pretend it's not there
    i could act like it's not real
    i'll just put things or feelings aside
    i know i've done this before
    but it never gets easier
    maybe i'm just getting ahead of myself
    maybe i'm really scared of getting hurt
    maybe, just maybe
    this was nothing but a dream

    04.43
    i always wanted to move on
    from a past that was too painful
    now i see something in you, about you
    that gives me that strange feeling again
    i never thought that it would be you
    others would always joke
    and i would just laugh along
    but now, why does it hurt inside
    you made me smile
    it got me all inspired
    but things changed overnight
    somehow i was just so bothered
    unsure of how or why i'm feeling this way
    maybe because it seemed impossible
    you and me can never happen
    oh why can't everything just go back
    to the ways things were before
    maybe i'll just pretend this is nothing
    maybe i'll convince myself this is scary
    maybe i'll hide or runaway from you
    maybe i can deny that this is true
    or maybe i'll lie and fake a smile
    when inside, my heart is being torn apart
    yes, i'll fake a smile
    and pretend i'm okay
    when you smile at me
    and sit right next to me
    yes, i'll be okay.

    vii.
    i should be sleeping
    instead i'm awake
    i've been tossing and turning
    but now it's too late
    my alarm clock's about to sound
    hears its countdown
    tick tock tick tock
    maybe i'll just turn it off
    i've been thinking, i've been reading
    which is probably why i just can't sleep

    viii.
    my heart
    emotion, feelings
    take chances
    risk everything
    just let it flow
    let it just take control
    my brain
    my mind, thinking
    to pretend and lie
    deny everything
    fake a smile or laugh
    you're just gonna get hurt
    which one's stronger?
    which one should you listen to?

Saturday, 26 April 2008

  • my handwriting analysis

    Welcome Anakat Catapang, here is your handwriting analysis. true?

     

    Anakat is moderately outgoing. Her emotions are stirred by sympathy and heart rendering stories. In fact, she can be kind, friendly, affectionate and considerate of others. She has the ability to put herself into the other person's shoes.

    Anakat will be somewhat moody, with highs and lows. Sometimes she will be happy, the next day she might be sad. She has the unique ability to get along equally well with what psychology calls introverts and extroverts. This is because she is in between. Psychology calls Anakat an ambivert. She understands the needs of both types. Although they get along, she will not tolerate anyone that is too "far out." She doesn't sway too far one way or the other.

    When convincing her to buy a product or an idea, a heart rendering story could mean a great deal to her. She puts herself in the same situation as the person in the story, yet she will not buy anything that seems overly impractical or illogical. Anakat is an expressive person. She outwardly shows her emotions. She may even show traces of tears when hearing a sad story.

    Anakat is a "middle-of-the-roader," politically as well as logically. She weighs both sides of an issue, sits on the fence, and then will decide when she finally has to. She basically doesn't relate to any far out ideas and usually won't go to the extreme on any issue.

     

    People that write their letters in an average height and average size are moderate in their ability to interact socially. According to the data input, Anakat doesn't write too large or too small, indicating a balanced ability to be social and interact with others.

     

    Anakat will be candid and direct when expressing her opinion. She will tell them what she thinks if they ask for it, whether they like it or not. So, if they don't really want her opinion, don't ask for it!

     

    Diplomacy is one of Anakat's best attributes. She has the ability to say what others want to hear. She can have tact with others. She has the ability to state things in such a way as to not offend someone else. Anakat can disagree without being disagreeable.

     

    In reference to Anakat's mental abilities, she has a very investigating and creating mind. She investigates projects rapidly because she is curious about many things. She gets involved in many projects that seem good at the beginning, but she soon must slow down and look at all the angles. She probably gets too many things going at once. When Anakat slows down, then she becomes more creative than before. Since it takes time to be creative, she must slow down to do it. She then decides what projects she has time to finish. Thus she finishes at a slower pace than when she started the project.

    She has the best of two kinds of minds. One is the quick investigating mind. The other is the creative mind. Her mind thinks quick and rapidly in the investigative mode. She can learn quicker, investigate more, and think faster. Anakat can then switch into her low gear. When she is in the slower mode, she can be creative, remember longer and stack facts in a logical manner. She is more logical this way and can climb mental mountains with a much better grip.

     

    Anakat is a practical person whose goals are planned, practical, and down to earth. This is typical of people with normal healthy self-esteem. She needs to visualize the end of a project before she starts. she finds joy in anticipation and planning. Notice that I said she plans everything she is going to do, that doesn't necessarily mean things go as planned. Anakat basically feels good about herself. She has a positive self-esteem which contributes to her success. She feels she has the ability to achieve anything she sets her mind to. However, she sets her goals using practicality-- not too "out of reach". She has enough self-confidence to leave a bad situation, yet, she will not take great risks, as they relate to her goals. A good esteem is one key to a happy life. Although there is room for improvement in the confidence catagery, her self-perception is better than average.

     

    Anakat is sarcastic. This is a defense mechanism designed to protect her ego when she feels hurt. She pokes people harder than she gets poked. These sarcastic remarks can be very funny. They can also be harsh, bitter, and caustic at the same time.

     

    Anakat has a temper. She uses this as a defense mechanism when she doesn't understand how to handle a situation. Temper is a hostile trait used to protect the ego. Temper can be a negative personality trait in the eyes of those around her.

     

    Anakat is having a lack of physical energy at the time this handwriting was written. If someone has very short and straight down lower loops (like in the y or g), this indicates this person's physical drive (activity or sex) is compromised. Usually, this indicates the person simply isn't interested in getting too physical right now. This could be a temporary mood which often happens when the body is sick and is healing. Or, this could be a result of an emotional or physical issue that is effecting Anakat 's energy level and interest in sex. Sex doesn't seem to be a priority at the moment.

     

    Anakat is very selective when choosing her inner circle of friends. She excludes all but a few from her fellowship. She limits her intimate friends to one or maybe two people. She tends not to trust the masses of people but chooses only a few to trust.

     

    Anakat has a healthy imagination and displays a fair amount of trust. She lets new people into her circle of friends. She uses her imagination to understand new ideas, things, and people.

     

    For a graphologist, the spacing on the page reflects the writer's attitude toward their own world and relationship to things in his or her own space. If the inputted data was correct Anakat has no white space or margins on a typical sheet of paper. Anakat fills up every last inch on the top, right, left, and bottom. Hmmm. If this is true, then Anakat has a very aggressive personality toward others and quite frankly lacks a bit of respect for the space and property of other people. I would be surprised if Anakat just comes into someone's home and helps herself to a drink in the refrigerator. This can be both an obnoxious personality trait and it can be assertive and effective in getting what you want. There isn't much fear of getting in trouble here, Anakat finds plenty of reasons to break the rules and get in trouble. (Okay, perhaps when she was younger, not anymore?) Basically, people with no margins are a handful.

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Sunday, 20 April 2008

  • random rants

    "i'm scared." i am also worried, nervous, anxious about something i don't really know what or why. i have this heavy feeling in my chest but it's not some sort of sickness or anything. i find it wierd. it's been a while. maybe because i have to go back to school on monday and pressure is on with exams and coursework. or maybe it's what my mom said earlier that to me. or maybe, maybe uhm.. maybe i'll just be able to sleep it off.

    "my heart is beating.." it always has been. it never stopped. yes, my heart has been broken before but that's no longer the issue. i'm happy where i am right now. even though there are occasional bumps, (sorry i'm not sure how to word it. but it's the best i can think of.) i'm really happy. i smile alot and enjoy a big laugh. inspiration comes and goes. and the times i do get a heavy heart, i know i've got a lot to smile for. (my partner is my favorite smile.Ü)

    "and the winning number is..." isn't the raffle boring when you didn't buy any ticket? haha. think about it. buying raffle tickets is very much like buying lottery tickets. what are the chances that your ticket number gets picked? but it really is also exciting to find out whether you won something, anything at all.

    "how's the weather today?" they say that the british usually talk about the weather. and i agree. i talk about the weather because i hate it. ok, hate is a strong word. but i just really don't like it. it's just so so so unpredictable. even the weatherman can be misleading. it could be raining really hard in the morning and very sunny and hot in the afternoon. the weather in london changes almost like a switch: on for rain and then off for sun. i mean where in the world can you find it snowing on the first day of springtime? (and sunny in winter?? really..)

    "procrastination is.." bad. it is bad and very unhealthy. why? well, usually you end up cramming and rushing things, which therefore makes things more stressful. and now i gotta stop. i go back to school on monday. goodbye waking up at noon and sleeping early in the morning. focus on schoolwork and exams are now in shift. good luck to me.
  • Charles Schultz Philosophy

    The following is the philosophy of Charles Schultz, the creator of the "Peanuts" comic strip. You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just read this straight through, and you'll get the point.

    1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.

    2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.

    3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America pageant..

    4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.

    5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.

    6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.

    How did you do?

    The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten.  Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.

    Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:

    1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.

    2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.

    3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.

    4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.

    5. Think of fiv e people you enjoy spending time with.

    Easier?

    The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards.  They are the ones that care.

    Pass this on to those people who have made a difference in your life.  "Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia "(Charles Schultz)

Thursday, 17 April 2008

  • Echoes, Silence, Patience and Grace

    [p] make a wish and place it in your heart.
    anything you want.
    everything you want
    [l] do you have it? good.
    now believe it can come true.
    you never know when the next miracle is gonna come from
    the next smile
    the next wish come true.
    [p] but if you believe that its right around the corner
    and you open your heart and mind to the possibility of it
    to the certainty of it
    [b] you may just get the thing you're wishing for.
    [n] the world is full of magic
    you just have to believe in it.
    so make your wish
    do u have it?
    [h] good.
    now believe in it.
    with all your heart.



    disclaimer: the title of this entry comes from the latest episode of my beloved one tree hill. yes, episode 13 is now out. yehey for that. and the long quote above comes from it. it was the ending lines to it. i totally love that show. start watching if you don't. and watch how i met your mother as well. i was watching the whole season from the start yesterday and i love it. (and yes, it was the tv show where britney spears had a cameo role.) lastly, i'm excited for gossip girl as well. i'm also addicted to that show so i say watch it as well. or miss out. haha. you know you love me. xoxo. :)

    anyways, going back to quote, i'm saying it's pretty simple to know what the message is. i say to also believe in the power of dreams. i then say to believe in the power of prayer as well. trust God because when there's nothing else left, it always works.

Wednesday, 16 April 2008

Tuesday, 15 April 2008

  • just because i'm bored

    just because i'm bored and lack the inspiration to write prose. here's some things i just wrote out of the blue.

    18.37
    the sunlight hidden behind the clouds
    struggling so hard to show itself
    it wants to break free
    it wants to shine as bright as it can
    then it does
    you say there's no other day that's brighter than today
    then maybe life can't get better than this

    12.17
    it's time to give back
    open your heart to others
    it's not just about you
    there are people that need more
    empty up your pockets
    who cares if you end up broke
    if it's simply for a good cause


    20.30
    bow
    the show's over
    the curtain's closing
    bow
    your time's up
    your turn's over
    bow
    no more second chances
    no looking back
    just say goodbye now.

Friday, 11 April 2008

  • a reason, one season, this lifetiem.

    People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

    When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on  your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

    Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.

    LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

    Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

Thursday, 10 April 2008

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mathprincess

  • Visit mathprincess's Xanga Site
    • Name: anakat
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 3/21/2007

About Me

  • I am Anna in college, Anakat in highschool, Nekatz to my closest friends, Ate at home and Kat to everyone else. I was Born in the Philippines, Grew up in Singapore, Fell in love with the Philippines, Moved to London and Loving every minute of Life. Who knows where I'd end up next? and Who'd I meet?

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